This is actually an age old dilemma. Many people will say that money and things do not matter in a relationship, but then those same people are in divorce court separating because of financial problems. If you have not heard by now, financial stress is one of the leading causes of divorce. The stress of never having enough somehow takes a toll on many relationships. So, the age old question deserves an answer. How much does money matter within a relationship? Should you call it quits if you find out the man of your dreams is penniless. While we may not be able to answer that exact question, below is a guide to learning how to tell if your significant other is going for broke. Hopefully, by the end of this article, you may decide upon the decision that is right for you!
FIVE WAYS TO TELL
HE/SHE IS GOING FOR BROKE!
CONSTANTLY TALKS ABOUT
HOW MUCH MONEY HE/SHE HAS!
Have you ever been around a person who is constantly talking about how many sexual partners they have, only to find out they are a virgin? Well, money kind of has the same rules. If a man constantly talks about how big his wallet is, chances are he is trying to convince you of what he does not have. Anyone who is financially at ease will never feel pressured to speak about how many millions of dollars they have just floating around. The question I would have to ask is, who are they trying to convince? As knowledge would have it, the main person they are trying to fool is not you, it is them!
BOTTOM LINE: Talking about your future plans and where you would love to vacation is a normal conversation topic, however, bringing up your net worth every second, just screams I am broke! Anyone who understands money, knows that it holds very little value. When a person is wise with their money, they recognize that money is nice to have but that it is just a means of supporting their family and having a bit extra to enjoy life. Beware of those who only speak of money 24/7. Either they do not have a penny to their name or they love money a bit too much.
"The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks (Luke 6:45)."
If a person has their heart on money too much, it is impossible for them to have their heart with you...
For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. It is through this craving that some have wandered away from the faith and pierced themselves with many pangs 1 Timothy 6:10
ALWAYS PULLING OUT
This method goes with number one. First you have to ask yourself, why is this person so ignorant. In case they were unaware, in the year 2012, we have bank accounts! Yes, and you can even sign up for it online. There is no reason why a person should carry wads of cash, unless they choose to NOT utilize a bank account or they just happen to find a bunch of Mr. George Washington's in hopes that it will impress you. Any gal who is smart understands that bank cards are far more impressive.
BOTTOM LINE: He is trying to show you a preview of what he does not have....MONEY!
CONVENIENTLY FORGETS HIS WALLET!
So you and your new date are in the middle of hanging out and loving every moment. He is whispering in your ears and you cannot get over how attractive and sweet he is....until the bill comes and he had you order everything you liked, only to conveniently forget his wallet. Now does this mistakes happen? Absolutely, but not as often as you think. Sometimes it all starts from you lending a few dollars here and a couple of bucks there, then all of a sudden, you find yourself paying for EVERYTHING!
BOTTOM LINE: As long as you are comfortable with dating a guy who does not feel it is necessary to help contribute, then you have yourself a great catch. However, I must warn you that any man who is allowing his gal to pay for the brunt of things will always expect her to do everything within the relationship. In other words, these relationships are often one-sided and this leads to anger, pain, heartache and if you eventually marry, divorce.
“One who is faithful in a very little is also faithful in much, and one who is dishonest in a very little is also dishonest in much (Luke 16:10)
LOVES TO TALK ABOUT THE FAKE PLANS
HE HAS FOR YOU AS A COUPLE!
Does your significant other always talk about where he would like to take you? Maybe it is a romantic cruise or just a walk in the park, however, the one thing he is missing is actually planning to go. He shares his dreams and opens his heart, not his wallet.
BOTTOM LINE: A healthy relationship always consist of dreaming and planning for the future, BUT, this does not give ANYONE a reason to lie and give false hope about where they have no intention of bringing you. A person that exhibits these types of behaviour is not to be trusted because they are solely focused on themselves. It does not take money to bring your significant other on a beautiful walk or massage their shoulders, it takes love. Promises of money...are false promises.
If then you have not been faithful in the unrighteous wealth, who will entrust to you the true riches?
HAS A NICE CAR AND
MATCHING SHOES TO GO WITH IT.
If his car is amazing, and so is everything he wears, well, he may not be so amazing. Be cautious of any person who is spending loads of money on a car. First, they are lacking the common knowledge that cars depreciate in value, and name brand clothes can kind of get old fashion. Many females will look at the items a man has and come to the false conclusion that he has money in the bank.
Well, number one, anyone who is silly enough to spend their money on materials that will not hold value, is NOT financially wise and the BIG number two is,
IF HE IS SPENDING ALL
THE MONEY ON HIM,
HE PROBABLY CAN NOT AFFORD YOU!
BOTTOM LINE: Money is not bad to have, it is a necessity. But sometimes it is imperative to not get into a relationship with someone who cannot handle their own material things. This type of relationship has a high potential to not last long or live a miserable life. This is because, if the only thing he is putting all of his effort towards is personal gain, then his heart is not ready for love until he can completely choose to not value his things over you.
“Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal Matthew 6:19
Think a dozen times before you marry a man who is not capable of handling the "little" they have. It is inevitable that marrying someone like this will turn disastrous. Besides any good man (or woman) ALWAYS TAKES CARE OF THEIR OWN...
A good man leaves an inheritance to his children's children, but the sinner's wealth is laid up for the righteous Proverbs 13:22
Written By: Te-Shandra Haskett, MBA
How to manage your finances!