It's that boss you cannot stand...
Your so called friend who continues to spread silly gossip about you...
That neighbor who pretends their noisy bad habit does not keep you up until the early hours of the next morning....
Whomever it may be that bothers you, revenge seems to be a perfect response. There is nothing that would make you feel better than making that nuisance get what they deserve. Understanding how many people feel, I decided to share a few options that you can choose from to handle some of those "annoying" people in your life. Read carefully to the end. Hope this helps!
1. To inflict punishment in return for (injury or insult).
2. To seek or take vengeance for (oneself or another person); avenge.
WAYS TO HANDLE A PERSON WHO HAS DONE YOU WRONG!
Sardines: Are a common type of fish consumed by humans, as sardines are rich in nutrients. They are commonly served in cans, but fresh sardines are often grilled, pickled or smoked.
I call this method the sardine attack because this technique involves at least 10 of the biggest cans of sardines you can find. Sardines can be at your local grocery store, but I would strongly encourage you to buy them online in case form. Sardines are extremely easy to ship to your location. Depending on how much you dislike the person and who you intend to give this gift, will set the standard for how fast you choose to ship them. Moving on....
Prices of case sardines!
The smell of Sardines!
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How to handle your cheating man!
After you have received your 10 cans of sardines, it is time to put your work into action. Locate the car of the individual you do not like. If it is someone at your job, do not stay late, otherwise you will appear suspicious. You are about to commit a smell crime and trust me, this is not something you want on your record.
The last and final step would be to slightly open up the can of sardines and place them in your lovely new friends car. This is a smell that will never go away. It is guaranteed to last them and their car a lifetime. Every time they crank up the car, their will be a strong whiff of sardines EVERYWHERE! If you have hid them appropriately, it could take months for them to find out why their car stinks. This method will have them losing friends instantly. No one wants a smelly friend. Sitting in a car filled with open sardines will give them a lasting "wonderful" fragrance.
If you are wondering how do you get into their car, then you are truly not ready for this experience. When you dislike someone, you know every little detail about them, because they are constantly corrupting your mind like word vomit.
Sit down for a bit, loathe about them until you can reach the point of sardines!
THE AWKWARD LOVE MOMENT!
That is right, you heard me! This method can be considered doing a great deed for someone. You may be actually helping their reputation, especially if they are know to be a giant jack- ass. At this point, I am sure you know who your least favorite person's boss is. Now, this next part is pretty tricky.
Write a long extensive love letter to their boss, telling them how deeply you feel about them and that you could not wait any further to hold in your feelings. You can either place this in your beloved enemies bosses' mailbox, or you can mail it to them, using their return address as the source of where the letter came from. Spray lots of perfume on the letter and maybe use some lipstick (Revlon color stay is highly recommended) to smooch the front of the envelope and the outside of it. If you need personal assistance on how to write an affective love note, I have provided you with some examples below.
But now that you have mailed off the material, sit back and watch the awkwardness unfold between someone who sent another person a love letter who has no clue they did it. LADIES, if you strongly dislike a man, make sure you send this love letter to another MALE coworker. This will increase his level of embarrassment 1,000 times. Chances are if he is not gay, he will be embarrassed, and if he is....he will STILL be embarrassed because he hasn't come out of the closet yet.
For maximum benefits, photocopy the love letter and place it at random places through his or her office. You can even mail it out to his/her close friends and family. Someone is BOUND to notice it!
Creative Poetry Ideas!
The Best Awkward moment Quotes!
THE FAKE ZONE!
This is actually one of my personal favorites. If the individual you are targeting has a "significant" other, it is your duty to find out where you can accidentally run into them. Once you have discovered where they spend most of their time, then you can take your plans into acton. Make a move...
Wait....Get your mind OUT of the gutter! I was not talking about that kind of move...ANYWAY...
I was referring to striking up an innocent conversation with the spouse or girlfriend/boyfriend of your annoying non-friend. Be very friendly, however, casually mention to them how much you enjoyed going out with the person you dislike so much. At first this seems like a "harmless" thing to do, but if you choose the dates upon which they were actually working late in the office.....trouble is on it's way!
Their partner will officially think they are having some kinky business going on the side. Now, you can stand there and watch the drama unfold, but I would strongly suggest you RUN LIKE THE WIND!
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How to deal with dishonest people!
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How to spot a liar!
CRAP THEM OUT!
Yes, you did hear correctly! Crap them out! The sardines is definitely a specialty, however, there is nothing like the smell of crap on shoes. It seems to follow you whereever you go. But instead of you stepping into the DOO DOO, make sure it's that person you can not stand. You can either invite them to a park for lunch where you know the best places where people do not pick up their dog poop, or you could live dangerously.
If there is no crap on sight, you can either take a small plastic bag and save some off of the ground, OR, if it is your lovely co-worker save your own crap while you are doing the DOO (in a plastic wrap) and when they are not looking, smear it on the bottom of their chair, desk, or wherever you think they are most likely to lay their head or body.
Believe me, no one wants to hang out with DOO DOO....
You smell soap!
Bath and body works!
Did you know the facebook thumbs up is the new middle finger?
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Attention ladies, this is why you do not have a date!
If those tactics are not good enough for them, you could aways try forgiveness. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term "forgiveness" it implies that you let go of all of the feelings of hatred you have towards someone else. It does not imply that you have to become best friends with someone, or even remain married to an unfaithful man/woman. However, this does suggest that you make a conscious choice NOT to think about all of the rotten things a person has done to you.
There are 3 ABC steps to forgiveness:
ACCEPTANCE: Recognize that whoever treated you wrong, can not undo what they have done. Even if people do not acknowledge that they have done anything, you still need to accept them for who they are and understand that the probability of them changing into a better person (or who you want them to be) is slim to zero.
BELIEVE: Understand that we reap what we sow in this life. No one does harm to you without it going unpunished, especially if it was done out of unkindness. It is not your responsibility to take revenge on those who have hurt you or your loved one. In fact, by actively hurting someone else, it can make you turn "bitter," cold and heartless. Everything that you complain the person you hate is like. Why would you want to become your enemy?
CHANGE: Although you cannot change anyone else, you CAN change the way you view life. Forgiveness is a long and hard process. It can take years to get the point of complete forgiveness, but a person must beware that NO ONE IS PERFECT, not even you. I am sure that somewhere down the line, someone was gracious enough to forgive you for your negative actions. I at least know one.
"Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you (Ephesians 4:32)."
BOTTOM LINE: Living in unforgiveness is detrimental to your growth as a better person. When you harbour deep feelings of dislike or hatred towards another human being, it WILL control YOU!. When you hate someone, you are constantly thinking about them and smiling whenever something bad happens to them. Call me crazy, but if you do not like someone, that is a little too much time for them to be on your mind.
As I always leave my readers, the choice is yours. Just remember that if you refuse to learn how to forgive, you are cheating yourself out of a healthy life. And the ultimate revenge is being kind.....
On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head (Romans 12:20)."
Authors Note: If you have currently not forgiven someone, it does not matter whether or ont you are religious or not, NOT LETTING THINGS GO WILL ONLY HURT YOU!
"'Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against one of your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the LORD (Leviticus 19:18)."
Dr. Phil talks about forgiveness!
" Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times (Matthew 18:21-22)."
Written By: Te-Shandra Haskett, MBA